Self Help Now: A community blog

Dr. Jacqueline B. Sallade offers advice for maintaining your mental health.

To the Alienated Fathers, the Victims of Brainwashing

Written by Dr. Jacqueline B. Sallade, Community blogger | Jun 16, 2013 3:07 PM

To the father who has been alienated from his child, Father's Day is the saddest day of the year. Who's to say that the mother who convinced the child that the father was a selfish loser didn't have some reasons for her bitterness and disappointment? However, poisoning the child was a crime which will color that person's life forever. What she did to the father is horrible, but he let it happen, too by not fighting for his right to make sure the child know of his persistent love and stayed in his life.

I see too many parents in this uncomfortable situation who hear "I hate you" enough that they give up. Sometimes, their own childhoods were so painful that the new wounds hurt all the more and they just don't have the courage and stamina to persevere. Sometimes, paramour, stepparents, or grandparents step in and confound the issue, helping the brainwasher in her job. Whatever the reasons, it's always complicated and tragic.

Of course, mothers experience this mess as well, but since it's Father's Day, I'm sending my heartfelt good wishes to the alienated fathers out there.

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