Self Help Now: A community blog

Dr. Jacqueline B. Sallade offers ideas for maintaining your mental health.

Marriage Rules

Written by Dr. Jacqueline B. Sallade, Community blogger | Oct 12, 2012 6:40 PM

What makes a relationship work? For sure, all successful relationships which are longer than the first chemical/biological, addictive affair-type romance, both work and don't work. Since people aren't perfect puzzle pieces to fit together and no one is perfect, there are compatibilities and conflicts, similarities and differences, agreements and disagreements. Successful couples accept the positive and negative, focus on the compatibilities and adjust to the differences. choose carefully the hills they want to die on and argue peaceably rather than hurtfully. They agree to disagree. They have learned from their previous relationship problems. They have a full commitment and willingness to work out compromises without resentment. Each one loses some and wins some. There is no abuse, no infidelity and no addiction. They trust and respect each other, maybe not completely every minute, but enough to know that there is loyalty and that the relationship is more important than their own self-centered needs.

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